Ten Questions I Ask Brides & Grooms

When meeting a bride and groom for the first time, there is always a little bit of nervousness for all of us. After all, this is a big day for everyone and we want to make sure we get it right. So just how do I get to know the happy couple? Well, I have a survey of about ten questions where, during the course of discussing them, we get to know each other a little better.

The most obvious first question is, Can you tell a little about yourselves? I ask this one to get a feel to see if the couple is out going or shy. This may give me an idea about how they feel being in the spotlight and if some words of comfort would be good idea or how we can take the pressure off if need be. Perhaps they will mention a hobby or interest they may have. If they like to sing maybe a karaoke option is worth mentioning. This question just opens up the conversation and sometimes interesting information comes to light.

The second quite obvious question is, Do you like to dance? Most times, but not always, the bride does and the groom does not. This gives me a clue as to if I might want to propose a few more games for the reception to take the weight off of them dancing so much or if I should suggest maybe only dancing for part of the song on the first dance. I might even suggest dance lessons to help them feel more comfortable when it does come time to dance.

Leading into, Do your guests like to dance? This question gives me a good notion as to what kind of a party reception we might have. If their guests don’t like to dance, then I start making a mental note, as well as on my question sheet, of what I can do to facilitate dancing or if we might shift the main focus away from dancing to perhaps, for example, a lip sync contest in the part of the reception where normally the dancing would start. In any case, the question, in some cases, puts forth a possible eventuality that we can prepare for.

The  What kind of music do you like? question is a very helpful one I find. This really allows me to narrow down the ambiance of the event. Whether it be Top Forty, Alternative or a mixture of new and old music, the bride and groom’s answers to this question allows me to make observations and provide suggestions when the couple are at a cross roads in their music choices.

On a scale of one to ten how important is the music for your function? is a really obvious question. If music is not high on their agenda then it usually means they are just maybe having a DJ because it is expected of them. I sometimes, in the case where music is not so important, suggest maybe a comedian, magician or acoustic guitar player might work better for their reception. It can cost me the event, but I feel it is better for everyone involved if the bride and groom are happy with their entertainment choices.

Do you like a bit of control over things or a lot? We have all known persons and bosses who like to micromanage. In the case of wedding receptions it is not uncommon to find this to be the case…and that is fine. It is just important to find this out in the initial stages so planning can begin on the right footing. In some ways couples that have definite ideas on what they want are easier because everything is laid out for me. As long as they receive their requests, they are quite happy. What makes things difficult are micro-managers who keep changing their minds right up to the last minute, and sometimes at the last minute, and expect perfect results.

Have you ever been to an event where you liked the DJ and why did you like them? There are many DJs. Some are better than others and some are just better suited to different types of events. Various DJs bring their own specialties, personalities and equipment to their functions so asking this question gives me a standard that the couple would appreciate having at their wedding. It is all about doing the best job you can and pleasing the client and guests, so feedback from this question is very useful.

And vice versa,  Have you ever been to an event where you didn’t like the DJ and why you did not like them? is an awesome query, that when answered by the couple, give me a red light warning of what not to do! It is also useful for delving deeper into other minor things that DJs may do that are not so irritating to the bride and groom but still would make them feel better if steered away from. In addition, since there are often all ages at a wedding, this can bring up some very good compromise discussions.

What is your vision for the music portion of the event? I like this one because I get an overall vision of how the couple wants the reception to go music wise. Do they want a variety of songs so that the music is appealing to a large segment of their guests or do they want only them and a few guests style of music to be played for example. In any case, we can start to narrow down music genres with this question.

After the reception is done, what adjective would you want to use to describe the music portion of the event? It is always good to end a survey on a positive note and this question has the bride and groom thinking of a fun and successful reception. It lightens the mood of the questioning and can even spark a humorous comment or two.

I find that these ten questions not only give me some good information on the couple and what they would like to see happen at their event, but it also brings up other questions and ideas that they perhaps never thought of. It is sort of a brainstorm session in a way. I certainly find the questions I ask to be helpful and I believe my clients do as well.